2011/04/17 by Elizabeth
People keep correcting me when I say things like, “My boyfriend and I have no plans for the weekend” – not because we’ve actually agreed to attend something and subsequently forgotten (although that does happen more often than you’d think) – but because they feel I should be saying “My fiancé and I…”.
Those italics are not just for emphasis – I think they represent the way people say the word fiancé. It’s somewhat onomatopoeic – you can’t say it without sounding like a wanker. And I avoid using it whenever I can.
I’m a fan of a lot of ‘F’ words – fun, fuck, fruitloops, fantasmagorical, flotsam… But this ‘F’ word I’m not so keen on. Don’t get me wrong, I love that I’m in the position of HAVING a fiancé, I just don’t want to call him that. It doesn’t suit him – it doesn’t suit us.
I’m not that thrilled with saying “my boyfriend” either, to be honest – it has always sounded very high schoolish to me. So, I tend to default to saying “my partner” – although having short hair and living in the suburb we do, I’m sure many people have been left with the impression I’m a lesbian if Mr Sweetpants isn’t nearby when I say “my partner and I” (not that there’s anything wrong with that).
Thankfully, we’re planning a short engagement, so I won’t have to excuse or disguise my lack of love for the ‘F’ word for too long. Then I can call him “my husband”, and he can call me his “ball and chain/trouble and strife”. Or we can just introduce each other using our actual names. How novel!
While we’re on the subject of objectionable words – moist. Horrible. And panties? WHY do American sitcom characters insist on using that word to describe their knickers? Urgh. And don’t even think about combining the two…